This will be a busy week!
Today I start Femara, drug #2. It says it may causes drowsiness so I'm not going to start it until tonight. I PRAY that I have less side effects than with the Clomid! The night hot flashes alone were enough to make me hate that drug! I only have to take it for 5 days and I can do anything for 5 days.
Talking to Dr. Diehl's nurse today, who by the way is SUPER sweet and understanding about all this and really tries to help me work appointments around my work schedule. And speaking of work schedule, while my boss doesn't know WHY I keep going to the doctor she is always very understanding about people needing to take care of things like doctors appointments. HUGE helps with all this. Anyway...my HSG (Hysterosalpingogram) is scheduled for this Thursday at 11:00am, also the same day I'm supposed to drive 5 hours to Bismarck, North Dakota for a class that is Friday and Saturday. Talk about a busy day! They said I could drive after the procedure and that I may just feel uncomfortable. So what is a HSG you may ask? (**TMI Warning**) An HSG is an xray where I will lay on a flat table (not intended for a pelvic exam) and a radiologist will use a tenaculum to clamp my cervix where he will then insert a catheter into my cervix to inject dye into my uterus and fallopian tubes to take a picture to look for any abnormalities on the inside of my uterus or blockage of the fallopian tubes. Its not supposed to be very comfortable :( (aren't you jealous?) but the whole procedure should take about 30 minutes. My doctor doesn't necessarily think that anything is abnormal or blocked, its just a standard test to "cover all the bases". Which leads into the other big test of the week-Todd's semen analysis (SA). Obviously we know the big problem is the way MY body works, but its also good to make sure nothing is wrong on Todd's end so he gets to go tomorrow morning and do that.
Please pray for GREAT results with all testing this week! This week will either tell us a lot more about whats going on or it will just rule out a lot of things. I start my next round of ultrasounds to see how I respond to the Femara on Monday.
Monday, September 20, 2010
Sunday, September 19, 2010
Something New to Blog About
Infertility.
Yep. I said it. The dreaded word that no couple ever wants to hear.
Here is the long version. **TMI Warning**
Almost 10 months ago when Todd deployed I decided to give my body a break from all medications, namely birth control pills. For 6 months my body did absolutely nothing, I had no period. I did not ovulate. (I had been doing Ovulation Prediction Kits so by the time I went to the doctor I'd at least know that) I got to the point where I knew something wasn't right so I went to the base OBGYN to start trying to find some answers. About 15 blood tests and one "Progesterone Challenge" (Take progesterone for 7 day to induce a period. No response). I still had no answers and was referred off base to an Infertility Specialist OBGYN named Dr. Diehl as well as a Reproductive Endocrinologist in Denver named Dr. Smith. Dr. Diehl consults with Dr. Smith so that time traveling to Denver is kept at a minimum. Dr. Diehl looks overall my labs and tests and basically told me in May that the only way Todd and I would ever have children is through fertility treatments or Invetrofertilization (IVF). My official diagnosis teeters somewhere between Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) and "Unexplained". The problem being that I have no clinical blood work or findings to confirm PCOS but I do have some, but not all of the signs and symptoms. Dr. Diehl then decides he wants to start one round of treatment, on Clomid, and do some more testing to see how I respond. I have to tell Todd all of this via Skype as he is still deployed and at that time we decided we still weren't ready for kids or for the stress that infertility treatments would bring (schedules, counting days, different hormone meds, endless doctors appointments,etc) We leave it at "we'll do the 1 round, see where we are, and wait until we're ready".
Flash forward to August when "round 1 begins".... BTW- Clomid is an evil, evil drug that causes SEVERE bloating, mood swings and hot flashes like a 60 year old going through Menopause. HATED. IT.
Naturally, my body doesn't respond to the drugs the way it's supposed to prompting Dr Diehl to inform me that "it may be more difficult than just taking a pill and making things work". Naturally, we begin to question what we do now. Are we ready to go down this road? What if it works next month? What if it doesn't work for years? Through lots of prayer and conversation God placed a scripture on my heart that actually hangs on a wall in our house. "Many are the plans of a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails". Proverbs 19:21. God revealed to me the many times just in my relationship with Todd that He has worked things out in HIS timing, without any help from me. So we concluded we would begin this journey of infertility and see where the Lord takes us. This was certainly NOT in OUR plans. Had I not even taken a break from medications in January, we wouldn't even know all of this. We also feel that right now we are in a place where we 1. have excellent health insurance that covers A LOT of infertility treatments and 2. We can logically and rationally makes decisions that are not emotionally drivenBut we do and that can only be part of God's plan. We don't know if it will be short. We don't know if it will be long. We don't know if it will end with trying IVF or heading towards adoption. But we do know that we will trust the Lord and His guidance and ask that you simply pray with us and for us. Pray for God's will. Pray for patience with the process. Pray for Grace with each different drug that I take. I will do my best to update my blog. Please feel free to email or call if you have any specific questions. Especially those of you that have shared the same struggles.
So that's my heart. In a nut shell :) So where do we go from here you ask? I start Round 2 on a different drug called Femara on Monday and will likely also have a Hysterosalpingogram (HSG) (sp?) possibly this Thursday to look at the inside of my insides to check for any other problems they may be missing.
I'll write a separate post about the HSG and what I think about Femara another day.
Thank you for reading this long post and welcome to a new place in my life. This hasn't been an easy road thus far and I fear the worst is yet to come. This whole process feels unnatural and when you live in a community of baby making machines it's sometimes a lonely place to be the one whose body doesn't work the way its supposed to.
Yep. I said it. The dreaded word that no couple ever wants to hear.
Here is the long version. **TMI Warning**
Almost 10 months ago when Todd deployed I decided to give my body a break from all medications, namely birth control pills. For 6 months my body did absolutely nothing, I had no period. I did not ovulate. (I had been doing Ovulation Prediction Kits so by the time I went to the doctor I'd at least know that) I got to the point where I knew something wasn't right so I went to the base OBGYN to start trying to find some answers. About 15 blood tests and one "Progesterone Challenge" (Take progesterone for 7 day to induce a period. No response). I still had no answers and was referred off base to an Infertility Specialist OBGYN named Dr. Diehl as well as a Reproductive Endocrinologist in Denver named Dr. Smith. Dr. Diehl consults with Dr. Smith so that time traveling to Denver is kept at a minimum. Dr. Diehl looks overall my labs and tests and basically told me in May that the only way Todd and I would ever have children is through fertility treatments or Invetrofertilization (IVF). My official diagnosis teeters somewhere between Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) and "Unexplained". The problem being that I have no clinical blood work or findings to confirm PCOS but I do have some, but not all of the signs and symptoms. Dr. Diehl then decides he wants to start one round of treatment, on Clomid, and do some more testing to see how I respond. I have to tell Todd all of this via Skype as he is still deployed and at that time we decided we still weren't ready for kids or for the stress that infertility treatments would bring (schedules, counting days, different hormone meds, endless doctors appointments,etc) We leave it at "we'll do the 1 round, see where we are, and wait until we're ready".
Flash forward to August when "round 1 begins".... BTW- Clomid is an evil, evil drug that causes SEVERE bloating, mood swings and hot flashes like a 60 year old going through Menopause. HATED. IT.
Naturally, my body doesn't respond to the drugs the way it's supposed to prompting Dr Diehl to inform me that "it may be more difficult than just taking a pill and making things work". Naturally, we begin to question what we do now. Are we ready to go down this road? What if it works next month? What if it doesn't work for years? Through lots of prayer and conversation God placed a scripture on my heart that actually hangs on a wall in our house. "Many are the plans of a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails". Proverbs 19:21. God revealed to me the many times just in my relationship with Todd that He has worked things out in HIS timing, without any help from me. So we concluded we would begin this journey of infertility and see where the Lord takes us. This was certainly NOT in OUR plans. Had I not even taken a break from medications in January, we wouldn't even know all of this. We also feel that right now we are in a place where we 1. have excellent health insurance that covers A LOT of infertility treatments and 2. We can logically and rationally makes decisions that are not emotionally drivenBut we do and that can only be part of God's plan. We don't know if it will be short. We don't know if it will be long. We don't know if it will end with trying IVF or heading towards adoption. But we do know that we will trust the Lord and His guidance and ask that you simply pray with us and for us. Pray for God's will. Pray for patience with the process. Pray for Grace with each different drug that I take. I will do my best to update my blog. Please feel free to email or call if you have any specific questions. Especially those of you that have shared the same struggles.
So that's my heart. In a nut shell :) So where do we go from here you ask? I start Round 2 on a different drug called Femara on Monday and will likely also have a Hysterosalpingogram (HSG) (sp?) possibly this Thursday to look at the inside of my insides to check for any other problems they may be missing.
I'll write a separate post about the HSG and what I think about Femara another day.
Thank you for reading this long post and welcome to a new place in my life. This hasn't been an easy road thus far and I fear the worst is yet to come. This whole process feels unnatural and when you live in a community of baby making machines it's sometimes a lonely place to be the one whose body doesn't work the way its supposed to.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Will I ever update?
I know, you're dying to know what we've been up to.
I WILL find the time to update with details of Todd's homecoming, our big Wyoming vacation and life post "reintegration".....just not today....
I WILL find the time to update with details of Todd's homecoming, our big Wyoming vacation and life post "reintegration".....just not today....
Monday, June 21, 2010
Its not too late for May right?
I was doing SO GOOD about at least blogging once a month...I made it almost 5 months! Since it's June 21, I'll go a head and update May and June since the next week and a half of June won't be that exciting to wait an extra week to hear about.
May was in every sense of the word, a roller coaster ride! I went to Texas, Dallas this time, for another wedding of another grad school friend. The wedding was only about 2 miles from my sister's house so I was able to spend some time with her and see friends as well. It was a quick trip as usual but so worth it!
Then my mom was supposed to com in town on May 28 but mother nature had other plans and decided to send massive downpour, tornado filled storms to the Black Hills on May 24 which led to our basement being flooded. Coming home after a long day at work to standing water in your basement is not exactly "ideal". This was the first time I've ever just stood frozen in time literally not knowing what to do. So I called my dad...who also didn't really know what to do since they don't have basements in Texas like we have them in the north. So I made a few other phone calls and got my very helpful neighbor and within about 2 hours I had a whole team of help including neighbors, friends and the Stanley Steam 24 hour water restoration team. It wasn't a fast process because of the holiday and the extent of the water damage but after 10 days of frustration, yes, a few tears and maybe a couple of inappropriate choices of words the basement got put back together...and re-arranged thanks to my mom :) My mom was awesome and changed her flight to come in 3 days early to help me with the basement so I didn't have to take off too much work to deal with it. She ended up being her for almost 2 full weeks and we did a lot of touristy things and A LOT of house things to try and get stuff done before Todd comes home. I think she was glad to finally go back to Texas!
May 31 marked mine and Todd's 2 year wedding anniversary! It was kind of bittersweet not having him here to celebrate but I did get to talk to him and since it was a holiday I shared the day with my closest friends and my mom here in South Dakota. I know he will likely miss other anniversaries and that's ok because he's proudly serving our country. There will be many other days to celebrate when he is home.
The first weekend of June was full of activity! On Saturday June 5, we did something called the Volksmarch at Crazy Horse Memorlal http://www.crazyhorsememorial.org/events/volksmarch.html We got to hike to the arm of the still in progress monument. You can only do this one time a year and we missed doing it last year so I was really glad to get to do it this year. What a different perspective of this giant monument!
Saturday June 6 I ran the Mickelson Trail Half Marathon in Deadwood...another nationally known event that I was happy to be a part of this year. The Mickelson Trail is part of the "Rail to Trail" system and spans 100 miles of the Black Hills http://gfp.sd.gov/state-parks/directory/mickelson-trail/default.aspx They do bike races and bike tours on the trail as well that I'd like to do at some point.
June 11-14 I went to Las Vegas for a weekend with some college friends. After all the drama in South Dakota with the house it was nice to just get away for a weekend, eat some good food, see a show and see one of my best friends. I didn't win big (didn't lose big either) but really just had a relaxing time.
Yesterday, June 20, I did my first ever Triathlon here in Rapid City. It was a sprint triathlon so 800m swin, 20K bike ride and 5K run. It was a lot of fun but I'm not sure I'm going to make Triathlons a regular part of my insane endurance sport schedule. I'm not particularly fond of the swimming part. I'd do this race again, and maybe one other. I definitely have a new appreciation for Ironmen! Holy Cow! That is just INSANITY!!
Well thats my wold travels and recent events. July will be pretty slow. I work the next few weekends (including the July 4 holiday) and I'll be spending time making sure all is ready for THE BIG HOMECOMING!! July 28 is the unofficial homecoming day! I'm trying not to count down yet but last I heard I think its about 34 days away! I am VERY much looking forward to my best friend being back and going on our "Western National Parks Road Trip"! So likely, I will no blog until August!
May was in every sense of the word, a roller coaster ride! I went to Texas, Dallas this time, for another wedding of another grad school friend. The wedding was only about 2 miles from my sister's house so I was able to spend some time with her and see friends as well. It was a quick trip as usual but so worth it!
Then my mom was supposed to com in town on May 28 but mother nature had other plans and decided to send massive downpour, tornado filled storms to the Black Hills on May 24 which led to our basement being flooded. Coming home after a long day at work to standing water in your basement is not exactly "ideal". This was the first time I've ever just stood frozen in time literally not knowing what to do. So I called my dad...who also didn't really know what to do since they don't have basements in Texas like we have them in the north. So I made a few other phone calls and got my very helpful neighbor and within about 2 hours I had a whole team of help including neighbors, friends and the Stanley Steam 24 hour water restoration team. It wasn't a fast process because of the holiday and the extent of the water damage but after 10 days of frustration, yes, a few tears and maybe a couple of inappropriate choices of words the basement got put back together...and re-arranged thanks to my mom :) My mom was awesome and changed her flight to come in 3 days early to help me with the basement so I didn't have to take off too much work to deal with it. She ended up being her for almost 2 full weeks and we did a lot of touristy things and A LOT of house things to try and get stuff done before Todd comes home. I think she was glad to finally go back to Texas!
May 31 marked mine and Todd's 2 year wedding anniversary! It was kind of bittersweet not having him here to celebrate but I did get to talk to him and since it was a holiday I shared the day with my closest friends and my mom here in South Dakota. I know he will likely miss other anniversaries and that's ok because he's proudly serving our country. There will be many other days to celebrate when he is home.
The first weekend of June was full of activity! On Saturday June 5, we did something called the Volksmarch at Crazy Horse Memorlal http://www.crazyhorsememorial.org/events/volksmarch.html We got to hike to the arm of the still in progress monument. You can only do this one time a year and we missed doing it last year so I was really glad to get to do it this year. What a different perspective of this giant monument!
Saturday June 6 I ran the Mickelson Trail Half Marathon in Deadwood...another nationally known event that I was happy to be a part of this year. The Mickelson Trail is part of the "Rail to Trail" system and spans 100 miles of the Black Hills http://gfp.sd.gov/state-parks/directory/mickelson-trail/default.aspx They do bike races and bike tours on the trail as well that I'd like to do at some point.
June 11-14 I went to Las Vegas for a weekend with some college friends. After all the drama in South Dakota with the house it was nice to just get away for a weekend, eat some good food, see a show and see one of my best friends. I didn't win big (didn't lose big either) but really just had a relaxing time.
Yesterday, June 20, I did my first ever Triathlon here in Rapid City. It was a sprint triathlon so 800m swin, 20K bike ride and 5K run. It was a lot of fun but I'm not sure I'm going to make Triathlons a regular part of my insane endurance sport schedule. I'm not particularly fond of the swimming part. I'd do this race again, and maybe one other. I definitely have a new appreciation for Ironmen! Holy Cow! That is just INSANITY!!
Well thats my wold travels and recent events. July will be pretty slow. I work the next few weekends (including the July 4 holiday) and I'll be spending time making sure all is ready for THE BIG HOMECOMING!! July 28 is the unofficial homecoming day! I'm trying not to count down yet but last I heard I think its about 34 days away! I am VERY much looking forward to my best friend being back and going on our "Western National Parks Road Trip"! So likely, I will no blog until August!
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
May
For the 3 people that read my blog- I don't feel like blogging. The basement flooded in a bad storm last week and I've been dealing with that for the past week and a half now. Maybe I'll finally update next week when sanity returns.
Saturday, May 8, 2010
Something to Look Forward to
Why am I blogging about something to look forward to you ask? So that its in writing and other people can be excited, maybe even a little jealous too :)
We've tossed around a lot of ideas as far as what to do and where to go when Todd gets home the end of July. There are some minor details that keep us pretty limited including:
1.Todd will have just gotten back from a 6 1/2 month deployment on crazy, mostly drug induced, 12+ hour work shift sleep schedules that he needs to get back on track.
2. The exact day they get back may change up until about 2 days before they get home.
3. They get 2 mandatory weeks of leave for free but have to actually take leave if you go more than about 8-10 hours away from base, i.e driving distance.
4. They ONLY have the 2 mandatory weeks because they have to be back to work 12 Aug to start preparing for a HUGE base exercise called Operation Readiness Exercise (ORE) in which they have a "mock" ORE in September and the real deal in October.
So where do you go when you live in South Dakota, want to "get away" but not have to actually take leave and not break the bank because you still want to go on a "big trip" after ORE?? Well here's the plan:
We're going to rent a camper from outdoor rec on base to be our traveling hotel (think $100 for a whole week!), pack up some food, the dogs, our bikes, our rock climbing gear and head west with stops at Devils Tower National Monument, Grand Tetons National Park, Yellowstone National Park, Jackson Hole Wyoming, Bozeman Montana and Theodore National Park in North Dakota before heading back to Rapid City. It makes a big loop if you look at it on a map and we're calling it our "Midwest National Parks Road Trip". We got our National Parks pass this year since we have 2 National Parks just here in South Dakota less than an hour from our house so we want to get its use and see the beauty of this part of the country. Others may not see this as an awesome trip, but we're pretty excited!
Like I said...something to look forward to :)
We've tossed around a lot of ideas as far as what to do and where to go when Todd gets home the end of July. There are some minor details that keep us pretty limited including:
1.Todd will have just gotten back from a 6 1/2 month deployment on crazy, mostly drug induced, 12+ hour work shift sleep schedules that he needs to get back on track.
2. The exact day they get back may change up until about 2 days before they get home.
3. They get 2 mandatory weeks of leave for free but have to actually take leave if you go more than about 8-10 hours away from base, i.e driving distance.
4. They ONLY have the 2 mandatory weeks because they have to be back to work 12 Aug to start preparing for a HUGE base exercise called Operation Readiness Exercise (ORE) in which they have a "mock" ORE in September and the real deal in October.
So where do you go when you live in South Dakota, want to "get away" but not have to actually take leave and not break the bank because you still want to go on a "big trip" after ORE?? Well here's the plan:
We're going to rent a camper from outdoor rec on base to be our traveling hotel (think $100 for a whole week!), pack up some food, the dogs, our bikes, our rock climbing gear and head west with stops at Devils Tower National Monument, Grand Tetons National Park, Yellowstone National Park, Jackson Hole Wyoming, Bozeman Montana and Theodore National Park in North Dakota before heading back to Rapid City. It makes a big loop if you look at it on a map and we're calling it our "Midwest National Parks Road Trip". We got our National Parks pass this year since we have 2 National Parks just here in South Dakota less than an hour from our house so we want to get its use and see the beauty of this part of the country. Others may not see this as an awesome trip, but we're pretty excited!
Like I said...something to look forward to :)
Friday, April 30, 2010
April Showers bring May....snow?
I really hope not. But we do have a chance of snow overnight tonight with a "Winter Weather Advisory" in the hills. It snowed the weekend we moved here April 24, 2009 and on May 2, 2008 Rapid City did get a blizzard. I hate to say that winter is not over yet :( Like a co-worker told me last week, "we have 4 seasons: June, July, August and Winter" SO TRUE!!
April had some good positives:
1. We reached the halfway point of deployment on April 20!!
2. I went to Chicago with two of my sister in laws for a weekend!
3. Todd turned 27
4. We "celebrated" our one year anniversary in South Dakota :)
While the weather is currently cold and windy with snow in the area we have had some great days thrown in there for a tease. One Sunday it was 70 degrees and I ran and biked and took the dogs to the park and literally did everything outside I could think of, it was so great!! It was funny this week mowing the yard for the first time and then driving to work with snow flurries the next morning. Needless to say, I'm VERY anxious for the weather to be consistently nice so that I can enjoy all my outdoor activities :)
Work is still great. I can't believe I've almost been an OT for a year! Once I reach my "year of experience" I can have students under me which is something I'm really looking forward too because I'd love to teach in an OT department at some point in life. I have to really interesting patients right now that are really challenging my skills.... and I like it :)
Todd is still busy busy flying and dropping bombs on the bad guys ;) We've been on pretty opposite schedules lately so talking has been really inconsistent and spread out which gets hard. It's also been one of those weeks where everything seems to go wrong, specifically things that I don't or can't fix. Lucky for me the guy that painted our house and finished our garage markets himself as a handyman and conveniently lives around the corner from me so he has graciously been helping me out with random things.
Yard work- specifically trees and my vegetable garden is still at the top of my "to-do" list but the weather doesn't want to cooperate with me on the weekends to get anything done. Otherwise, not doing much to the house right now. I think I need a hobby other than running and biking. Any suggestions??
April had some good positives:
1. We reached the halfway point of deployment on April 20!!
2. I went to Chicago with two of my sister in laws for a weekend!
3. Todd turned 27
4. We "celebrated" our one year anniversary in South Dakota :)
While the weather is currently cold and windy with snow in the area we have had some great days thrown in there for a tease. One Sunday it was 70 degrees and I ran and biked and took the dogs to the park and literally did everything outside I could think of, it was so great!! It was funny this week mowing the yard for the first time and then driving to work with snow flurries the next morning. Needless to say, I'm VERY anxious for the weather to be consistently nice so that I can enjoy all my outdoor activities :)
Work is still great. I can't believe I've almost been an OT for a year! Once I reach my "year of experience" I can have students under me which is something I'm really looking forward too because I'd love to teach in an OT department at some point in life. I have to really interesting patients right now that are really challenging my skills.... and I like it :)
Todd is still busy busy flying and dropping bombs on the bad guys ;) We've been on pretty opposite schedules lately so talking has been really inconsistent and spread out which gets hard. It's also been one of those weeks where everything seems to go wrong, specifically things that I don't or can't fix. Lucky for me the guy that painted our house and finished our garage markets himself as a handyman and conveniently lives around the corner from me so he has graciously been helping me out with random things.
Yard work- specifically trees and my vegetable garden is still at the top of my "to-do" list but the weather doesn't want to cooperate with me on the weekends to get anything done. Otherwise, not doing much to the house right now. I think I need a hobby other than running and biking. Any suggestions??
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