Thankful

Yes, I'm late with a Thanksgiving post.  We just got home this afternoon from 5 days in Texas with family. I'm especially thankful for family. Words can not describe how thankful I am for my family and for Todd's family. We are blessed to have such love in our lives.
I'm thankful for our jobs. I'm thankful that I go to work everyday and do something that I truly love and that makes a difference in someone's life. I'm thankful that Todd serves our country so that I can be thankful for al the freedoms we have. I'm thankful that our jobs pay the bills and put food on our table. I'm thankful that our jobs give us the ability to travel to see family.
I'm thankful to serve a Lord that loves us and provides all we really need.
I'm thankful and I'm blessed.

Seriously? Is EVERYONE pregnant?!

I really mean it. I went to a squadron dinner tonight and I swear I was the ONLY wife either not pregnant or not already with kids. Since the guys got home there is seriously 10 women preggo. I feel like everytime I turn around there is someone else announcing their big news. And to top it off our old squadron commander's wife just found out she was pregnant with her SIXTH kid, and SECOND one unplanned!! Oh, and did I mention she is 43!! I know literally about 15 women pregnant right now and all of them got pregnant within 3 months of trying (or without trying at all). It completely boggles my mind how easy it is for some people and we do SO MUCH and yet its still not happening.

::vent over::

Something Different

A post about something other than infertility. Vacation. While it seems like Todd just got home it also seems like there is something/somewhere he has to go every month until his next deployment. We want to squeeze in a pre-deployment/anniversary trip sometime in late Spring. Where should we go? While we would love to go to Europe we're thinking financially that will not happen. Some other thought are, California wine country, Pacific Northwest, New England, Hawaii. 

Taking suggestions...

This storm

I've heard this song at least 1,000 times but tonight while driving to dinner I turned it up really loud and actually listened to the lyrics. This sums up my heart on many a days...


Praise You in This Storm by Casting Crowns


I was sure by now,God, that You would have reached down 
and wiped our tears away, 
stepped in and saved the day. 
But once again, I say amen 
and it's still raining 
as the thunder rolls 
I barely hear You whisper through the rain, 
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls 
I raise my hands and praise 
the God who gives and takes away. 

And I'll praise you in this storm 
and I will lift my hands 
for You are who You are 
no matter where I am 
and every tear I've cried 
You hold in your hand 
You never left my side 
and though my heart is torn 
I will praise You in this storm 

I remember when I stumbled in the wind 
You heard my cry to You
and raised me up again 
my strength is almost gone how can I carry on 
if I can't find You 
and as the thunder rolls 
I barely hear You whisper through the rain 
"I'm with you"
and as Your mercy falls 
I raise my hands and praise 
the God who gives and takes away 

And I'll praise you in this storm 
and I will lift my hands 
for You are who You are 
no matter where I am 
and every tear I've cried 
You hold in your hand 
You never left my side 
and though my heart is torn 
I will praise You in this storm  

I lift my eyes onto the hills 
where does my help come from? 
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth 
I lift my eyes onto the hills 
where does my help come from? 
My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth 

And I'll praise you in this storm 
and I will lift my hands 
for You are who You are 
no matter where I am 
and every tear I've cried 
You hold in your hand 
You never left my side 
and though my heart is torn 
I will praise You in this storm 

And we wait...

Went back to the doctor today to see what the cyst is doing. We named it CeCe the cyst last week since apparently fertility meds and cysts create symptoms like pregnancy except I would only be giving birth to a 8cm cyst. Anyway, CeCe has not gotten bigger but has also not gotten smaller. Dr. Diehl is pretty conservative and doesn't want to operate on it unless it gets bigger/significantly more painful so the plan is to wait 4 weeks to see if it goes away then start Provera (progesterone to make me have a period) to start a new cycle. Basically means we won't be doing anything fertility wise for about 6 weeks (you take Provera for 10 days and don't start your period for about 4 days after) and all we do is wait. One one hand its another whole month wasted but on the other hand even 4 months of treatments has taken its toll on  me physically,mentally and emotionally so I'll take it as God's way of giving me a little break. My left ovary is and won't do anything while the right ovary is consumed with CeCe. Once we start this cycle in December it will be our last one before meeting with the Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE) from Denver in January about injectable meds and IVF.  I would LOVE to think we weren't heading that route but my response to meds thus far is proving that its going to take more than "conservative IF treatment".

That's all thats new here. Todd will be gone most of November. He leaves Thursday for an air show in Miami (tough job huh?) and will be home about 4 days before going to Arctic Survival School in Alaska for 9 days. He'll get back just in time for Thanksgiving.